Term 1 is a chance for new beginnings for not only students, but for staff starting new roles alongside staff returning from the summer break. Beginnings are important, but they can also be tricky. They can leave us with a feeling of ambivalence. They remind us of the potential we must use to go forward and choose our path in life, but also contain the aspect of the unknown. Students may feel uncomfortable at the start, with new environments to contend with alongside new uniform to wear and a new timetable to figure out. These things are unknowns and can feel scary. As humans, we have an innate fear of the unknown and this feeling can leave you feeling trapped or uncertain of how to go forward. This feeling is what we call anxiety, and it involves living life with a consistent focus on the future and a fear of the consequences.
Even with the best intentions, life doesn’t always work out how we would like it. It’s then what we do with this situation that matters. Do we allow the unknown to keep us stuck in a position of fear or do we use it as an opportunity to change? Do we make a conscious break from past ways of thinking and behaving and step into a new way of being? Like an animal shedding its skin, emerging to face the world in a new form, potentially stronger and better for making the change. It helps to have the best start possible, and we can help students do this by being consistent. Consistency allows students to feel a sense of assurance; they know they can rely on you to be the same as when they left. It gives them one less variable to consider in making decisions in life and a safe base to return to when things don’t quite work out. They can return, regulate their feelings and be ready to ‘go again’. A stable and secure relationship allows for great scope in exploration, to get out and really live life to its fullest extent. Ideally this is achieved at home, but meaningful relationships can be formed with any person offering care.
By Andrew Tilley
Brompton Academy Counsellor
